I saw him sitting over there, near the hood of my car on a rock smoking a cigarette deep in thought. Looking out at the beach I walked up to him and said “those things can kill you know”, he looked up at me and smiled, a slow sad smile but did not reply continuing to smoke. Sitting down next to him i nudged him playfully as I asked him in a soft voice “want to die and leave me alone?”. He immediately flinched stiffening, “I’m sorry” I said, regretting my actions immediately . “it’s okay lil sis” he replied finally speaking “you meant no harm” before lapsing into silence again.

As we sat there my head resting on his shoulder his hand intertwined with mine, we watched the setting set as it set on the horizon not speaking. “Zoe used to love the sunset, it made her feel nothing is impossible” he said breaking the silence before taking a drag of his cigarette, exhaling the smoke slowly through his mouth. “I’m sorry ” I said again not knowing what else to say to comfort him. Taking a final puff of his cigarette, he threw the stump to the ground crushing it under his feet. looking at the final rays of the setting sun he spoke in a low voice, so low that i had to strain myself to hear it “i already died lil sis, that day on the highway i died with her” turning around giving me a smile so haunted and sad it made my heart break, before walking away to the car, the last rays of the sun fading away from his retreating figure.


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